


I Just Want You To Know Who I Am

by NeonDomino



Series: Marauders and Mausoleums [1]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Dungeons & Dragons, First Meetings, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Protective Sirius Black, Secret Messages
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-02
Updated: 2021-02-02
Packaged: 2021-03-13 22:08:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,455
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29160909
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NeonDomino/pseuds/NeonDomino
Summary: Remus is used to the advice written on his mirror that keeps him safe. So when the word 'RUN' appears, he does as he's told, no questions asked.
Relationships: Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Series: Marauders and Mausoleums [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2140656
Comments: 4
Kudos: 66





	I Just Want You To Know Who I Am

**Author's Note:**

> I have a Wolfstar discord. Anyone wanna join? PM me :)

* * *

The first time a message appears in the mirror, it freaks Remus out more than anything ever has before, because it's words on his mirror, revealed by the steam of his bath. At first, he assumes it's someone who has broken in, leaving words to confuse him and to make him paranoid. But there's no-one in his house. There are no marks to suggest that the house has been entered without his knowledge. There's nothing missing - and he'd know, because there are very few things of value in that house.

So his thoughts turn to magic. He's not an expert - he's not a sorcerer, just a healer himself, but there have to be spells that can leave writing on mirrors. Someone could have perhaps teleported in somehow, though Remus isn't that familiar with any transportation magic. He learned to be a healer to help his mum, but after losing her, he wanted to help all he could.

Unfortunately the town has other healers. Ones that belong to the church, and the only benefit to Remus is that he's more often than not free, so can come at a moment's notice. Some people don't have time to find the church and explain everything, so Remus manages to get enough to get by. Just barely.

The first message tells him _'Be careful. Be home before the full moon'_. Remus of course ignores this message. He gets the implications of what it's telling him though - the mention of the full moon means Werewolf, but the guards protect the town from such beings, and Remus can't see how they'd get to him.

He writes it off as a joke, a prank. Someone trying to mess with him.

Yet he still heads home before it gets dark. Not because of the spooky mirror warning, no - but because he wants to get in before the rain started. He has felt a few drops. A bit of rain has never bothered him before, but this whole situation has left him very unsettled.

A girl rushes up to him when he's just a street from his house, in need of help for her father, and Remus immediately forgets about the warning as he follows the girl to the home to find her father and heal him. The gold he receives from that would pay for his dinner for over a week, and it's worth the two hours of draining magic. He would have been happy to heal the man for less, but wasn't going to turn down the offer from the man with the big house and wealth).

That was the mistake. He walks home in the dark. The only light coming from the full moon in the sky, and the attack happens just as he is opening his door.

He hasn't yet found out the name of the beast that attacked, but he remembers it vividly. The werewolf had strange marking that Remus is confident he could pick out should he encounter wolves again. He spends the last of his energy to stumble inside and shut the door, and the last of his magic to heal the wound as best he could. A real cure for Lycanthrope was too expensive, so he just does what he can to stop the blood loss for now.

He realises, as he crawls through the house, his hip making him want to cry out in pain, that he should have listened to the mirror.

He tells himself that he's not going to make that mistake again. He's going to listen next time, because if he had listened today, he'd have stayed safe and well. In his frail state, he doesn't make it to bed that night.

* * *

Future messages that he's sent aren't always as worrisome. They're just helpful. A message about an overturned cart on Fitzgerald street has him walking a different route. A reminder to return his library books, or a nice message remind him to look after himself. Once, the mirror even told him when the bakery was giving out cut-price bread as they had to shut quickly, and wanted to clear their stock.

Paying a quarter price for his bread helped Remus a lot, because money is always an issue. With his own health issues to take into account, which means using his powers to heal himself, leaving him with little magic to help others, he finds it harder to get money together. He used to pick up odd-jobs around town, but with him needing time off for the full-moon and recovery afterwards, people are more reluctant to hire him - instead choosing those that aren't asking for so much time off for _'unrevealed causes'_.

But there have been warnings too. The mirror has requested at times for him not to leave the house. The first time, he felt silly listening - but having learned from the lycanthrope incident, he listened. He heard shouting in the distance. Gunfire. The next day, he learnt that there had been a small riot in the part of town he was planning on visiting.

He's managed to avoid three incidents that way, and he trusts his mirror friend.

The mirror helps. It makes him feel less alone, because something or someone is writing those messages. There's a being out there somewhere that cares about him.

Remus rarely checks his messages until after his bath. The heat of the bath steams up the room, leaving words on the mirror for him to look at afterwards, and at this time of the month more than any, he likes to soak and try to relax his muscles. The mirror isn't close enough for him to make out the writing on it, but he does like to look over and see if there's something there.

The herbs he often uses to do so are sprinkled in and Remus settles into the bath. The steam heats the room, and the mirror is blank, but it's still early and sometimes he doesn't get a message.

He glances again as he steps out of the water, but there's nothing. Maybe it's because he's awake earlier that morning? He grabs a towel and dries himself, before dressing in clean clothes and going over to the mirror to get himself ready for the day.

Maybe he could go for a walk this morning and see if the bakery has fresh bread left? He considers his energy and how much he thinks he can walk, and he starts to brush his teeth.

As he does so, a line appears. He watches, frowning slightly at the size of the letter.

_'R'_

Remus spits the toothpaste and starts to rinse out his mouth, his eyes turning back to the mirror.

_'U'_

It's almost as if he knows what the next letter is going to be. These two take up the majority of the mirror, and it's not like there are many things to write in letters that big and urgent.

The second the last letter appears, he's ready to do as asked.

_'N!'_

He rubs his arm over the mirror, clearing the message, and he bolts from the room. He knows he'll be feeling this later, but the mirror has never been wrong, and it's never felt this urgent. Something or someone is coming, or something bad is going to happen and Remus needs to get out of there.

He gets his socks on, doubling up on pairs before pulling on his boots. He grabs an old bag that he used to use for travelling and starts to fill it. Some clothes, his favourite book, his favourite blanket with a texture that soothes him, and some photos. A few small trinkets that mean the world to him and finally, he tops that with all the food he has. If he's running, food matters.

He empties every coin he has into his coin-purse and glances around for anything valuable that he can sell. He has to run and he doesn't know when - or if - he'll be back, so he doesn't want to leave behind anything that matters. Clothes and things are easily replaceable, but photos are not.

There's little else to take. The bag isn't that heavy, and Remus heads out, hood of his cloak over his head as he does so. He moves at the same pace as others on the street, trying not to stand out because he doesn't know if it's a person he should be avoiding. It could be something different. What if there's a dragon attack? Though wouldn't the warning from the mirror have gone to everyone? Or the guards would have alerted the city if it was something city-wide like that.

No. This is something about _him_ , so Remus moves, sticking down the street, turning onto the busy high-street. He's considering the nearest exit in town, but the rising sunlight is bouncing off something in the shop window.

Remus knows he should move now, but he feels at a loss without his mirror, and he needs supplies. So he ducks into the shop and pulls out the few valuables that don't hold sentimental value, and sells them. He buys some dried food - enough to keep him going on his journey should he run out, and he buys a mirror.

He's not sure if it'll work on a smaller mirror. He sometimes wondered if the mirror was enchanted, and that's how he got the messages - but it's too big for him to carry with him, and he's sure that whatever is causing the messages will understand why he couldn't take that one.

But the small charcoal mirror stands out to him because it has a cover on a hinge that'll stop the glass shattering too easily. It's good for travelling, it'll fit in his bag, and it's big enough to see the messages.

It sets him back a whole gold piece, but it's worth it if it works.

He's about to step out of the shop when he sees them - three men - savage looking ones - just passing the door. None look his way, they all stride up the street and Remus gets a bad feeling about it. He starts moving, glancing back only once - the men are turning down the road that leads to his home, and he knows that this is the threat. So he continues on, heading through town. He doesn't go to the nearest exit because if these men are looking for him, they'll perhaps assume he went that way. No, he heads in the other direction from there.

It takes him twenty minutes to get to where he wants to go, because he picks up his pace slightly and he takes shortcuts and alleys, being careful that people don't notice him too much. He hates the alleys and avoids the puddles and the muck, but better to get a little grimy from them than delay in avoiding the alleys altogether.

He gets out of town and the hill heads upwards, and he takes a moment to look back.

A plume of smoke rises into the air, and Remus just knows that it's his home. His home is gone, but he's safe.

And he needs to keep moving, because people are looking for him.

* * *

He's put a few miles between him and the town before he stops for a rest. Everything hurts. He can barely manage anymore.

He needed to stop an hour ago, but he was scared. People are after him. His home is gone and he's quite scared.

He sets up a protective circle around himself, warding the area should anything humanoid or with ill intent approach, and he settles to sleep. It's cold and he knows he won't sleep for long, but perhaps the short rest will help him move a bit further before dark falls.

It's been an hour, or a little over an hour since he closed his eyes, and he's feeling the ache in his muscles. But the rest has helped, and he stands up, slowly stretching out his muscles.

He looks in his bag before he sets off, taking out some bread because he knows it'll only be good for a couple of days, and he eats a little. As he places the rest away, his hands brush against the mirror.

Would it work?

He's not sure. The messages are usually there in the morning, and he doesn't see them otherwise. He's always thought that they were a daily sort of thing, but… but maybe the entity that provides the messages just kept missing him at other times.

Remus reaches for the holy symbol around his neck - one that was once his mother's - and takes a deep breath as he opens the mirror with his other hand. The spell is silent, just a breath and a movement of his hand, but a heavy steam passes from his fingers, shifting in the air and after a moment, the mirror fogs up.

There are words there, and Remus lowers his hand, eagerly reading.

_'Are you safe?'_

It's a question. He stares at it for a long moment. Can he even answer that? He's never considered that he could send a message back.

But he reaches out.

_'I'm safe.'_

The words stay on the mirror for a moment before they start to disappear, as though someone is wiping them.

_'Good.'_

Remus fogs the glass up again. _'I didn't know I could send messages.'_

It's a few minutes before there is a reply.

_'I know. I won't know which way to send you until morning.'_

Remus wipes the words away, and he fogs up the mirror again so he can reply, but the writer has more words for him.

_'I'll do my best to keep you safe.'_

Remus wipes the words away, fogs the mirror up and writes a reply.

_'Thank you. I didn't know if a different mirror would work. I'm a little scared.'_

_'You're safe. I'm still here. I promise. I'm still here with you.'_

* * *

He walks. He could be going in the wrong direction for all he knows, but he needs to get away from the town and to safety. He uses whatever spells he can to do things like hide his tracks, but he's sure he's not going to be able to hide forever. He's not used to this nature thing, and he misses his home already.

He'll work something out when he's safe, he tells himself. Perhaps he can find refuge in a church? Safety in return for healing and offering aid? He hopes so.

Night falls and he sets up his protective wards again. There are howls of wolves, but that doesn't concern him because wolves sense the beast within so they're the only wild animal that he doesn't have to be overly worried about.

But morning comes quickly, and when Remus wakes, he realises that the warming charms have gone. He casts another on himself, and a healing charm to try and aid the ache of his body, and to stop any illness that might want to come about due to sleeping in the cold outdoors.

The first thing he does is check his mirror.

_'North. I'm going to come find you. Go North until you see a town, then North-East.'_

Remus has been going north-west for the most part, and he's just glad that the mirror isn't telling him to go South or something, which is back towards the town he's come from.

But he's going to meet whoever has been writing the messages. Part of him is scared, but this - person, he assumes - is the one who has tried to help him and keep him safe, so he can only continue to trust this person.

He sends his own message, feeling less lonely than before.

_'North it is.'_

Then he starts to walk again, having a breakfast of dried meat on the remaining bread as he goes.

* * *

Sirius' power comes to him through music. The strum of the instrument calms him enough for him to make sense of his magic, to let it flow from him.

But it's unstable still, and sometimes his body tries to do spells it doesn't quite understand. It's how he ended up walking in the dreams of the most beautiful man in existence. It's how he's _somehow_ formed a bond with this man. So when he uses his powers to see the future, he sees this man's day instead. When he uses his messaging ability to send a message to the guy, even at the long distance (in which the spell wouldn't usually work), the spell appears on the man's mirror.

He's stopped this stranger from dying more than once, though regrets not doing more to persuade him not to go out during that full moon. Sirius doesn't recognise the town, he doesn't know where to go to help him, and it's a long time before he sees a vision that tells him the place.

But the last vision shows the man's death and Sirius panics. He's forcing James and Peter to pack up and leave the inn and start travelling, because he's watched this man for months to keep him safe. He's feeling protective over him. Maybe something more at this point.

He does the spell each and every morning when he wakes. It's his morning ritual now - checking on the other man and offering help where possible. He's used to the words appearing in the air and being wiped away from the man's mirror after he reads them, but the man never responds.

He never seems to see any messages aside from the first one, and Sirius isn't sure if the spell only works once a day, or if there's a restriction on time between casting the spell. Or perhaps the man isn't checked for more messages.

He feels cold that day as he watches. He sees three men finding him. Torturing him to join their pack. He can't see the quiet man's death, the visions never show that far. But it's likely he could die, and that's why Sirius' message is short and urgent.

The man has listened before. He's built that trust and can only hope he listens. He hopes the man has faith. But in case he hasn't, Sirius is coming, even if it takes every last coin to do so.

He messages several times throughout that day. The messages don't last long, they just slowly fade as the magic disapperates. But finally - one sticks. That means the man is looking into a mirror once more, and he's seeing the message.

And for the first time, he gets an answer.

* * *

_'Run. We're close. Delay them and we'll be there. Delay, don't fight.'_

Remus doesn't have much to pack up, and he moves fast in the direction he was going the night before. Four days travelling and he knew that these men would catch him eventually, but he's relieved to know that whatever stranger is looking out for him is on the way. He just needs time for them to reach each other and then he's safe.

Safe because the man from the mirror has protected him for months. If he can trust anyone, it's him - and it's about time Remus trusted someone.

He moves quickly, though all the travelling so close to the full moon has left him a little weak. He's only used spells in the evening, knowing that the resting will give him the power back, and a healing spell each morning and afternoon to keep him going.

But he moves and does his best to get as far in the direction he's been informed to go. The closer he gets to the stranger, the better. But if this person says he needs to delay them, then… that means he's going to get caught.

He listens carefully as he moves, and when he hears them, he pauses and he uses a spell to protect himself.

"Remus Lupin?"

"Who wants to know?" Remus asks. He speeds up.

"Greyback sent us."

Remus walks, not increasing his speed again. That name carries weight - the man is dangerous and is known to rule over his kind. Remus wants nothing to do with him. He opens his mouth to say so, but he remembers the advice. Delay them.

"Greyback?" he asks instead. An explanation buys him a minute or two. He doesn't stop.

The men catch up, moving to his side, though there is some distance. The spell has some time on it, and he's not reacted badly yet, so they might try get his attention in a friendly way first (even after setting his home on fire).

"Surely you know of Greyback. The lord of our kind."

"Lord?" the second man says, with a snort. "I'd say the king of our kind."

"I know the name," Remus admits, after another moment's thought. "Greyback the Werewolf. I just wasn't sure what he's doing in these parts, or yourselves for that matter. Or what any of this has to do with me."

"It has everything to do with you," the man says. "Greyback himself came to pay you a visit. An old friend of your fathers. He was fond of your dad, and wanted to bring you under his wing as it were."

"Greyback and my dad were friends?" Remus asks quietly.

"Long before your mother entered the picture," the third man laughs. "Special friends. So when he found out where you lived… well, he thought you might need his protection."

"He was the one who bit me?" Remus asks, glancing around for the first time. These are wolves - like him - but feral ones, Greyback's ones.

The man he's looking at nods. "He's been waiting for you to join us, to seek us out. But you haven't. We were tasked with finding you, but you already left town. You couldn't have been expecting us, so where are you off to, little wolf?"

"I was hoping to seek further training as a healer," Remus lies. "Someone told me that Littlemore has someone who can train me." He keeps his voice steady. "As much as I appreciate Greyback reaching out, I would really like to at least visit with this healer."

"I'm afraid we can't let you do that," the second man says. "Greyback is expecting you. He's been expecting you for days, and he'll already be angry that you're taking so long."

"Town is half a day away, and we've got a job to do."

Remus sighs. "I'm still weak after the full moon and the travelling. Perhaps we can sit and rest for an hour and you can tell me more about why he wants me - and how you found me."

The men look between each other. "We'll give you ten minutes to have a piss and a snack," one says. "You can rest at night like the rest of us, and you'll rest once you're with the pack."

Remus takes a moment to think about it. If he argues, he might not get those ten minutes either. So he'll accept them and hope that he can get them to wait longer.

* * *

They move fast, leaving their horses tied up when they see the four men making camp, and Sirius smiles. His love has managed to delay them long enough for the three Marauders to arrive.

"Peter, you know what to do," he says, "James."

They nod. "Which one is the one you want left alive?"

"Sexy guy with beautiful amber eyes," Sirius insists. "Whichever is reluctant to leave. If you need to wait and watch, do so. I'll get closer and Peter, I'll wait for the signal."

The pair nod and turn towards the group. Peter transforms into a mouse and James grabs him, setting Peter on his shoulder, before disappearing into the trees and out of sight. Sirius tries to see him as he always does, but James appears to be invisible.

Sirius does his usual count. He gives James time, before he starts forward. He ambles forward onto the path and whistles a tune.

As he approaches the four men look at him, and Sirius grins. "Howdy," he says. "I'm just passing through. Do you mind if I make use of your fire?"

One of the werewolves bares his teeth a little, and Sirus widens his eyes. "Just for five minutes and I'll be on my way. I've got some supplies, happy to share them if you save me having to build my own."

"We haven't eaten fresh in a while," one of the other men mutters.

"Five minutes," the first one growls.

Sirius nods. He moves closer and removes some of the food from his pack and passes it out, before pulling his lute off his back.

"Have you heard the song about the Marauders?" he asks. "Current hit, popular in all the nearby towns." He starts to strum. He just needs to keep all eyes on him. "Or I can play a song called Message on the Glass." His eyes slide towards the handsome man, whose eyebrows raise ever so slightly at the words. He understands what Sirius is saying.

He doesn't respond though. He turns his gaze towards the three wolves and waits.

"I wouldn't mind a bit of music before we set on our way. But any funny business… well, we'll rip you to shreds."

Sirius nods. "Course. I'm just a travelling bard," he insists. "Just trying to make a living, meet people. Not looking to start anything." He starts to strum. Off to the side, he sees the mouse sitting on a nearby rock.

Sirius strums a calming song and he waits for James to strike.

And one of the werewolves fall to the ground, throat slit.

* * *

Remus wasn't sure what he was expecting, but a gorgeous bard certainly wasn't what he thought he'd find that day. But the bard talks about messages on the glass. He's referencing the mirror and Remus knows this is the man.

He doesn't trust himself to speak because if he does, he might give something away. He waits for the guy's lead, because this is the person he trusts with his life. This utterly gorgeous bard.

Nothing happens for a minute, then one of the bodies hits the floor, dead. Blood trickles down his throat but he doesn't make a sound, and Remus realises that it's not the first wound.

A man stands behind him, and before Remus knows what's happening, a little mouse shifts into a man and raises his staff. Lightning hits another werewolf.

The first is quick, however, and lunges for Remus. But the bard moves in the way, hissing some words that Remus can't see, and the werewolf falls back, fear in his eyes as he does so. He backs away.

The lightning-werewolf dives for the Druid, and the Rogue follows, and the werewolf by him and the bard come to its senses and lunges once more, knocking the bard down. He pulls out a dagger and shoves it in the bard's side. "We warned you," the werewolf spits.

Remus throws a shield over the bard, and tries to do something to heal him. A second passes and the bard shimmers, disappearing from where he is, appearing a short distance away.

The werewolf doesn't notice, he's too busy coming for Remus, but suddenly a crown of thorns appears on his head and his expression goes blank.

"Go deal with that werewolf attacking my friends will you?" the bard says. The werewolf hesitates for a moment, as though he's trying to fight the spell, but he finally rushes over, and starts fighting the other werewolf.

One falls, leaving one still standing, and the druid shoots shards of ice which explode on his skin.

The man lunges for the rogue, nearest to him, and they start to fight. Remus throws out a healing spell towards the bard, whose songs send lights out to the members of the party, making their attacks more powerful, and finally that one falls too.

They all look hurt, and Remus walks over to the other two men and reaches for their arms. As his skin touches theirs, healing flows through him. Gold sparks glimmer around them as the spell takes effect.

"Saved a fortune on healing potions," the guy with glasses says, pushing his hood down. "Wanna take a break here or do we want to start moving towards town?"

Remus looks towards the bard. "I take it you were the one sending messages?"

"Yeah. About that - I screwed up a spell some months ago. I was supposed to be able to see my future, but it showed me yours - and it kept showing me it. I… I got a little attached and wanted to keep you safe. I just told myself that… well, it was fate that wanted me to help you."

"Plus the idiot has been pining over you for months," the druid supplies.

"Pining? Me?" Remus is bewildered at this, he's not anyone special and this guy is clearly amazing. "Oh." His cheeks redden and he attempts to smile, and gets a blinding smile in return.

"So, we're the Marauders. I'm Peter, this is James and Sirius. It's good to finally meet you."

He holds out his hand and Remus shakes it, and shakes James'. "I'm Remus Lupin," he tells them. "I'm glad you came." His gaze moves over to Sirius. "And you… you've saved my life." He strides over and throws his arms around the other man.

It should be strange. They've never met before, but something about it just feels right. The person he trusts more than anything - with his life.

Sirius' arms wrap around him. "A few times, I think," he murmurs. "And I'm not gonna stop now. I mean… we can find you somewhere to settle, hidden from Greyback if you'd like… or…"

"Or?" Remus asks. Because of course he doesn't want to leave Sirius. He wants to find out why Sirius was pining over him. He wants to get to know Sirius, the man who has looked out for him and tried his best to protect him. The person who stopped him feeling so lonely.

Sirius grins. "We get into some stupid shit. Wouldn't hurt to have a healer around, if you're up for it? Pay isn't too bad, we split everything equally. Adventure, never know where we're going to be in a month's time. And you get to see me every day." He winks. "

Remus smiles shyly. "Sounds like something I couldn't possibly refuse," he murmurs. "You know that I'm…"

"Yeah. I'm sorry. I should have helped you better, but there are cures out there in the world, and we'll help you. So how about it. Do you want to be a Marauder? I mean, making it here in four days alone… maybe you prefer being independent rather than a group, but… but we'd love to - mostly me of course - would love to have you join us."

Remus nods. This is insane. He's used to a quiet life. But… quiet can be dull and boring, and being around Sirius and the others sounds exciting. How could he turn down a proposal like this?

"Great. Let's start moving."

James and Peter lead the way and Remus sneaks a glance at Sirius. And another. The third one, he finds Sirius looking back.

"You know… we can only afford three rooms," Sirius says. "You may have to bunk with me."

"I'm not complaining," Remus admits shyly. "Is that going to be a regular thing?"

"If you want," Sirius replies. "Can't believe I'm finally with you."

"I can't believe you put yourselves at risk just for me."

Sirius grins. An arm slips around Remus' waist. "I've been having visions of you for months. Fate brought me to you, Fate wants this, and it doesn't hurt that you're pretty gorgeous."

"You are too," Remus murmurs.

"Have you ever been in love before?" Sirius asks, and Remus shakes his head. "Okay good. Hopefully we can rectify that together. One more thing… I might end up kissing you if we share a bed. What are your thoughts on that? I mean, unless you're not interested."

Remus' cheeks redden. "I'm quite open to the concept of a midnight kiss," he admits. "Though I don't mind them in the daytime too."

Sirius pauses and turns towards Remus. The others continue walking, but Remus knows that they won't get too far ahead. "Good. Because I've wanted to kiss you for so long." His hands rest on Remus' waist and he leans in and their lips meet.

"We're staying in the next town overnight," Sirius tells him softly, reaching up to push aside some hair in his eyes.. "We're leaving tomorrow morning. I'm so happy that you'll be there at my side as we do."

"Me too."

* * *


End file.
